JJ Campbell, When What If Becomes Why Not

blood-tasting

i’m at the age now
that it is easier to
give up than fight
back

and as tempting as
that is, i’m too fucking
stubborn to just quit

i still like the fight

burning the candle
at both ends

punching brick walls
and tasting blood

i look at all these
scars and laugh

apparently, i never
met the right woman

there has to be one
of them out there
that thinks this is
cool

or maybe that’s just
another damn lie
i was raised on

what if

i haven’t got
to the point
in my life
where i look
at all these
bottles of
pills and
think

what if

but the money
is running out

eventually my
mother will be
dead

and loneliness
will be my
closest friend

that’s exactly
when what if
becomes

why not

none of them are winning (so far)

all the pretty
blondes are
russian and
out to take
what little
money i
have

it’s a race
between
them and
the african
men posing
as nursing
students to
see which
will capture
my heart or
bank account
first

none of them
are winning
so far

my stubborn
soul is still
out ahead

but there’s
this mysterious
soul from los
angeles closing
very fast

a tall blonde
with legs for
miles

i’m probably
doomed

around the holidays

and you’re still writing?
that’s good

do you make any money doing
that?

so how are you going to pay
for things?

what do you mean you don’t
want anything?

you think your mother is going
to leave it all to you?

and you think that will cover
the bills?

who is going to pay for your
medical expenses?

what do you mean you just
won’t go to the hospital?

who gives a fuck that mozart
died penniless, you think you
are that good?

where the fuck did you get
this ego?

your father?

your father was just another
child that was stupid enough
to bring children in this world

and people wonder why i tend
to want to avoid family around
the holidays

JJ Campbell (1976-?) is trapped in suburbia, looking for lonely housewives. He’s been widely published over the years, most recently at Under the Bleachers, Synchronized Chaos, The Beatnik Cowboy, Mad Swirl and Misfit Magazine. His latest chapbook, the taste of blood on christmas morning, was published by Analog Submission Press.

You can find JJ waxing poetic on his mildly entertaining blog evil delights.

To read more of JJ on Dodging The Rain, click here.

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